Lack Of Romance In Life

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Are you single?  Have you ever fallen madly in love?  Did you ever find “the one” and lost him or haven’t you?  I bet lots of us have so many romantic stories to share.  But I also bet, that if you’re single right now; there were no happy endings in your life.  I’m one of those statistics of singles out there; but I’m not looking.

I’ve only fallen madly in love two times in my life.  Of course, there were no happy endings.  The first time, I was like 21 years old.  I was not interested in being with nobody.  At the time, I had recently finished my associate degree and was starting a new job.  I met him at a small seminary where I was studying the Bible.   When I suddenly couldn’t take the guy out of my mind; it took me by surprise.  Then, a sharp pain with sadness would stay in my chest every time we were apart.  Obviously, we are not together today because he didn’t feel the same way about me.   It was very hard to feel my heart broken for the first time in my life.  There was nothing nobody could ever do or say to make me feel better.

Five years after that experience, I thought that I would never feel the same way again.  But it happened again: but this time, it was worst.  The person I had fallen for was a mentally disturbed guy.  There is nothing worst in the world than falling in love with a guy who is bipolar and doesn’t get psychiatric treatment for his condition.  At the time I was totally unaware of it; I kept making excuses for his erratic behavior….always blaming myself.   I’ve never felt so helpless and unworthy towards someone.

Needless to say, that when the day of my epiphany came, I was thrilled.  I fell out of that miserable state when I realized that he was the problem, not me.  He was the one who was not worthy of me. There’s nothing more empowering than getting out of a destructive feeling.  It’s like being born again.  I knew that I had changed a lot but I used that knowledge to my advantage.

After that second time, I had a relationship with someone but the feelings were not the same.  I was conscience that if it wasn’t gonna work, I would just walk out without looking back.  Well, it happened.  The relationship didn’t work out and I’ve never looked back ever since.

I’ve never felt madly in love again. But I still remember how it felt.  Being in love is a beautiful feeling…but it must be more thrilling if the object of your affections feels the same way about you.  I didn’t have that experience but I imagine that if things would’ve worked out differently;  I would’ve still be there.

Right now, I’m living a happy middle life level.  I’m not madly in love with any human guy; but I love romance.  I love God, He is my Perfect Love, “the One & Only”.  He never makes me cry, He never makes me feel unworthy, unhappy, jealous, defeated, disappointed, mad, frustrated, ugly or old.  He makes me feel loved, special, unique, beautiful, rare, worthy, young, willing to hold on, pleased and immensely happy.  His love has made me love better my family, my friends, myself and my life. It doesn’t matter all the times that suffering, failure or rejection come to my life; I always feel loved and supported.

So I guess that my love life does have a happy ending.  I have found a perfect love that keeps me really happy and in peace.  Isn’t that what life is all about?

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4 thoughts on “Lack Of Romance In Life

  1. Well, if you find a good guy (with no bad breath or illnesses) who is worthy of your attention, respects you and gives you hugs and kisses; knock yourself out. Just thank God you don’t live where I live. Here, the very few men that are available are either gay, crazy or young enough to be my offspring. 😛 Thanks for visiting my page

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